Sunday, February 26, 2006
i've been wondering why i cant cry as easily as i could before.
its this suffocating feeling.
like i really feel comforted when i can cry out to God, but now, the tears just dont flow.
went to meet jac for lunch today.
remembered how much we love jan, geri and shazzy darling.
i miss minxing too! oh wells.
am still very sad.
i mean not sad, just stoned out.
like im not of this world anymore.
i can like trip over a rock, and get laughed at by my cousin.
spill the drinks, and lots of stupid things.
but i thank god for moss.
moss like this LIFESIZE care bear.
its still hard to believe he's real.
MOSS YOU HEAR THAT?!
i dunno. i feel that serve ending, is such a waste.
its like cg's rather dry.
i just dont know how to explain it.
in SERVE, our spiritual hunger is high,
we keep each other accountible.
i miss praying with shaz everynight.
i dunno.
but jac asked me this.
about the 12 disciples.
did they really love Jesus?
yes, you might say.
its the same for us.
these few mths spent together, yes we grew alot.
but the disciples were sent out to spread God's love.
and that's what we are supposed to do.
not stick in our own comfort zone.
but i still miss geri shazstone jan jac georgie mingyang tins wl,
if only ; you say.
thanks moss, for alot of things. thankyouvery much.
5:24 PM
im done
Saturday, February 25, 2006
IM BACK! (:
no body really cares. cos all those who do, dont read my blog. HAHAHA.
irony.
but who cares. id just blog.
SERVE IS almost OVER. 2 hours more of it only!
on tuesday
ITS SO SAD.
oh my gosh!!!
i hope our group remains close like nuts.
i'll miss everyonee!
really, cos its been awesome experience.
spritually, ive matured so much!
and for the first time ever! i got tau pok-ed!
cos the guys were tau poking each other the day before,
and CRAZY JAC GERI and JAN and WHOMEVERS, decide it'll be fun to taupok a girl!
- it was cool thou x)
i love everysingle one of them like nuttos.
and WHOOTS. i received a few budget givers; gifts.
these people decide to share my valentines day and birthday present!
but its so expensive, i dont care x)
i received 2, TWO , i kissed dating goodbye books!
both from the craziest and most treasured people on earth!
one from JAC and another from KA!
one's going platinum man.
oh wells!
from jac, it means a whole new deal.
from ka, i just badly wanted to read that book.
and its the very first year where someone actually asked me to be their valentine.
(:
awwwww, but well, lets just say we kissed dating goodbye!
i think im mad, but i dunno, jan says that God will honour those who honours him.
yea. so much things on my mind.
i'll just hand it all to God. eunice and i applied for the same course! hahahahahah. coolness!
but guess what, a thousand people applied for it too! crapp. but let's just trust God here.
i cant remember what i wanted to type anymore, so i'd prolly just stop here, and complete it soon. some other time, when im less tired.
LOVE.
12:47 PM
im done
Monday, February 13, 2006
jac is sucha darling. i thank EVERYONE who's been keeping me in their prayers. JAC. my whole cg. i simply love you guys. abby! MOJO. NANA. daffoonnoo. kim. cheryl. gen. dan. aunty winnie! auntie sab! MOSS. and all. tins who keeps being super tolerant. TINS AND MOSS FOR BRIGHTENING ME UP ON SAT MORN! hahahahaha. i still have my bunch of serve mates to thank. poanie. matt. shazdarling. estherminxin!
i really love the Lord my God so much. i cant believe he's sent so many angels. i mean it sounds really cliche, but i really wanna thank you all. I WANNA THANK , moss! for being this really awesome budd. awesome man of god! i know u're kinda dissappointed and all, but you know u have me! had a heart to heart prayer with mojo today. i really pray that God will just set her free. there's so many things in life we wanna fight for. i really dont know how to go about with my life without my god. if people really wanna know my results, i got 19 for my L1 R4. i got 24 for my L1 R2B2. that's why im like in this black hole. matt says its okay. tins says its ok. aunty winnie and everyone else says it is too. so funny. if only it really was.
i dunno. i just pray that id be able to get accepted into tp's interior architecture and design. i have no portfolio. no testimonials. no good grades. no th i n g.
but jac gave me this verse.
2 Cor 1:9-11 Indeed in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.
6:17 AM
im done
Sunday, February 12, 2006
-
everything feels like crapp.
i miss jac.
dear lord, you know every worry in every mind. you know how much we need you.
dear lord, please be merciful on thy child. You know more than anything, sch is one thing that all of us place above wealth and status. you know how sch is impt to us, once we cant make it anywhere.
DEAR LORD. have grace on us. let my contrite heart rejoice. help us throught all our trials and temptation. help us through the darkest hours, and the pointless seconds. Lord, i, do not deserve anything more than what i got, but please Lord, just bring me to the place you will. Father, that your divine plans will show the world how great you are Lord, as we fall down, and lay our crowns. bless us Father.
Amen
1:35 PM
im done
Thursday, February 09, 2006
some one got me an ashlee simpson cd! x)
God has been truly amazing, in every circumstance.
He would NEVER short change you.
His plans are divine.
spiritual, or not. Love life, or not.
just trust in him; although its hard, trust me.
it always helps to have people like my beloved jacorina and wanli around.
it always helps to wait.
it always helps to be obedient.
3:30 PM
im done
Friday, February 03, 2006
did you hear me say,
i L.O.V.E ASHLEE SIMPSON!
hahahahahha.
i know its crazy! i know YOU roll your eyes. but i still love her! (:
tins say i should stop knowing so much bout tabloids and stuff. i think its kinda true man.
know so much bout nonsence, isnt gonna help in life. and once again in life, i surrendered all money issues to God. it struck me when janice was giving devotion bout money, that i would find it hard to be extremly generous sometimes. but oh wells, i did, and i feel like there's no more bondage btwn money and me (: . its been amazing where my money comes from. God really provides. ive watch 3 movies like just in 3 weeks, and it all cos almost 10 bucks. cheaperby a dozen2 for FUN! geisha- out of boredom, I NOT STUPID2 cos i really wanted to watch it and tins agreed X). gonna watch FUN WITH DICK AND JANE, cos wanli and tins wants to. and then there's lunch at sakae. dinners at nydc. dates with nana, and alot of icecream(b&Js rock) ! PLUS cabfares are inevitable cos matt and us are kinda lazy. x) andthere's like super alot of money spent on fellowship that my mom and dad and BROTHER keep nagging that i dunno how to spend my money. that's been my life so far :)
yea, and we've been having lessons by focus on the family.
WHAT IS LOVE.
the sessions have been okay. its really funny when its roll playing time. and esp when bings is acting! and the stuff they highlight bout the dangers of sex. and everything else. they are like SUPER open. i mean seriously. and then there's the part bout your wedding dress is WHITE cos it stands for purity. I NEVER KNEW THAT! strange enough.
i feel like ive learn so much! it amazes me. its like this new excitement and passion burning within. but i know its so strong now cos im in SERVE, and its this awesome christian environment, where you dwell in CONSTANT christian fellowship. i never knew the part about the being equally yoke meant alot. I never knew what spiritual warfare was really about. I never knew how much harm the properity gospel could do. i never knew what covenents meant, never knew so many things. maybe it wasnt that i never knew, but maybe it was i didnt take the time to study it. im really blessed to have a friend like Jestyn, who's really mature in his spiritual thinking and that has helped me alot.` he once said this. humans are aware of what they are doing, but they dont do anything about it.
you'd have to agree.
i have been blessed with the greatest intellects. mingyang, tins, JAC, georgie, sharon, wanli, estherminxin,and janice.
they all have thought me so much in so many different ways! prayer, spiritual walks, thoughts, experiences, and all that. its like every think means so much more now. its almost my birthday soon! :) i cant believe it. im seventeen ready. i can understand why my mom regrets getting married and having children now. I've been a major pain in her butt. my brother and i, are like the worst pair of sibling matched ever, but still, we're PERFECT for each other. today's the first time ever my brother spoke to me in the most gentlest voice ever. and i replied him in my MOST gently voice. although we love each other, i dont think we've ever been this soft-spoken too each other. but anyhow, he used his big voice after that.
in conclusion, hahah, YUYU,triston, bings, alot of people say that Os result would be out on mon! or fri! 6th feb or 13th? i dunno. its crappy lar. i feel so scared, anxious, and ultra nervous. i believe in times like this, our faiths will be shaken.
will we still trust that our God is faithful, when he doesnt answer our prayer?
Lamentations 3:19-26 . read the whole passage if you one, but the steadfast love of the LORD never Ceases. he's mercies never come to an end, they are new every morning, new every morning, great is thy faithfulness oh LORD, great is thy faithfulness.
11:20 PM
im done
